My job is project based work that gives me about four months of work a year. Usually, Miss A gets to stay at my mom’s house when I go back to work. She has done that her entire two years of life! This last project was different though. My mom wanted some extra cash and landed a decent paying, full time job working as Christmas help. That meant I no longer had a babysitter! I freaked out for a couple of weeks thinking that I could not afford a sitter and that I didn’t want to leave Miss A some place new and scary to her! I had to regain self control and figure out a plan. I ended up posting on my Facebook wall to see if anyone I knew was interested in babysitting for me. Luckily, I ended up finding someone with a three year old son who enjoyed babysitting. (I don’t enjoy babysitting so it’s hard for me to understand people who genuinely like it… !! Am I terrible or what??) Anyways, here is Miss A’s response to the new sitter…
Me: Do you want to go play with a new friend and play with new toys?
Miss A: Yeah! I want to play with a new friend!! OOOH NEW TOYS!!
I took her over to the babysitter’s house for a quick visit the day before I was going back to work. She seemed happy to see the girl and meet the three year old boy.
Day 1 while dropping her off….
Me: Okay, Mommy has to go to work. You get to stay here and play with your new friend! And you get to play with a new doggy and kitty toooo!
Miss A: WAHHH!! NO MAMA! I don’t want to stay! WAHHHHHH!! *Biggest crocodile tears ever*
Me: It’s okay. Mommy pick you up later when I’m all done with work.
Miss A: *squeezing my legs for dear life* Wahhhhhh!! No! Noo!! *saddest crocodile tears pouring down*
Me: It’s okay. I’ll see you soon. I have to work and I will be right back to bring you home. I love you! Hugs and kisses!
Miss A: Noooo! Wahhhhh!
Me: I love you baby girl. Mommy will see you later. *The door shuts*
[[[AHHhhhhh! I can’t do this! OH MY GOSH!! I’M NOT GOING TO SURVIVE THIS. I THINK I’LL QUIT MY JOB AND JUST TAKE HER HOME NOW!! I CAN’T TAKE IT!]]]
I was instantly reminded me of horrific scenes in WWII movies of Jewish children being ripped away from their families…
I cried a few dozen tears and had a terrible first day back at work. I don’t know who had the worst experience but when I picked her back up, she was happily playing. She ran to the door to meet me and gave me a big hug and kiss. “My mommy’s here! My mommy’s here!” I instantly felt better.
I brought her home and then the real transition began. She refused to sleep in her bed from that point on. I left her with a stranger and she was so traumatized that she insisted upon sleeping in the same room as us. We laid her into her own bed (like normal) but instead of her peacefully going to sleep, she woke up a solid 12 times that night. She came running into our bedroom, wanting to lay next to our bed. We brought her back to her own room each of those 12 times until finally caving in a couple hours before our alarm went off. It was exhausting.
|Miss A and her make shift bed next to our bed|
The following days played out the same way. Miss A crying and sobbing when I dropped her off, while I tried to maintain my own composure. And then at night, constantly returning her to her own bed to sleep. I decided, that being in my third trimester of pregnancy, I couldn’t handle that much sleep interruption combined with a full work day so we allowed her to sleep in the rocking chair or the couch as she requested. She still ended up waking up numerous times and running to our room… and us bringing her back to the chair or couch. After about four days of sleep deprivation and fear of the real sleep deprivation coming our way with a newborn baby, we just made her a bed on the floor next to ours. I worried about how we would get her back to sleeping in her own bed again but decided it was best not to care about that quite yet. We didn’t want her to feel unloved or scared so we gave up.
|Miss A sleeping on her chair|
After about two weeks of terrible mornings and her refusing to sleep in her own bedroom, she became comfortable and back to her normal self again. She wasn’t happy leaving me at the new babysitter’s house but she was no longer terrified. We ended up parting in peace, without tears, and only a small whimper. BIG BEAR HUG SQUEEZES and DOZENS OF KISSES. But that’s nothing to complain about. What is needed is needed. I appreciated it, for sure.
Now that I am back to not working again, Miss A snuggles into my bed early morning after my husband leaves for work. She is my little angel.
Miss A: Do you know what the angel says? The angel says, “I LOVE YOU!”
|Miss A peacefully sleeping in our bed|